Given two choices I try to list the pros and cons and make my decision that way. Gary decides based entirely on the cons. So anytime I make a decision Gary thinks he's helping by telling me all the negatives. So there's lot of "YOU PICKED CHOICE A? BUT WHAT ABOUT --" followed by all the negatives, and if I change my mind it's "YOU PICKED CHOICE B? BUT WHAT ABOUT --" and so on, eternally.
I cut him off this time and insisted we focus on the positives this time. You wouldn't think there were positives, but here is what we came up with.
- This is not my first hospice. I'll have some idea of how things operate. Mom's hospice was the worst experience of my life, but I know what to expect now.
- I had half the money from the sale of Mom's house earmarked for David anyway, so I can throw money at any problems. No place for me to sleep at Daves? Order a bed. Hire a home health aide and live in a hotel. Hire an aide anyway. (Though I know from the experience with Mom one month of 24 hour help would eat up all the earmark. But hush, that's negative.)
- The financial advisor and I agreed to leave the earmarked house fund in an accessible account. That means I don't have to pay any fees or penalties to access it.
- Forget the earmark funds, I am RICH in frequent flyer miles. A quarter of a million miles piled up during the pandemic from our daily Amazon purchases. I could hop on a plane and fly back to see Gary on a weekend if I had to.
- I just got Evusheld, and as long as I can avoid any BQ viruses I'll be protected.
- I am on a lull at work. I won't be dumping work on someone else, and I have a month and a half of sick and vacation time. After that I can go on Family and Medical Leave and chew up the earmark faster.
- Gary had a migraine all last week that meant I had to shuttle him around two hours each day, but he says he's better.