I automatically win all arguments during August, my birthday month. I plan to cash in the next thirty days. CASH IN.
- The bathroom fan does not work and the ceiling is sagging. Gary wants to fix the fan himself, and I think I could fix the ceiling myself, but what I really am going to do is have someone else do the work. Because it's my birthday month.
- I am switching to fiber optic gigabyte internet sometime this month, because the cable is out again this morning, because it's my birthday. Your commercials are cute, Spectrum, but you are the ones who are evil.
- I am moving on to the next big home improvement project: replacing the worn-out back door. I still think of it as the "new back door," because it was new 27 years ago. It did not stand up well against the elements.
I will be stretching the limits of the birthday month exemption with that last one. When the negotiations begin, usually I can clap my hands in the air and announce "BIRTHDAY MONTH" and he can say nothing, but not sure if he will go along with that this time.
Then again, sometimes he argues about home improvements just because he feels that's his job as a man. As a man he thinks he should a) to do the work himself and/or b) argue at every opportunity.
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