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May 11, 2020



That does explain, to some degree, why you maybe haven't caught whatever plague it is that he has! I have been wondering how on earth Suppressed Immune System hasn't been knocked for a loop - and that may be that it simply hasn't had the one virus unit (or whatever) that would be necessary to even get sick!

(I think knowing *why* can be helpful for abandonment issues, though - an unexplained/unexpected absence and your imagination can go to town, but someone specifically caring for you *by* being distant is different. Usually.)


KC - we are both also washing our hands every time we leave our rooms. My abandonment issues seem to center on choice - he chooses to be in the bathroom for half an hour, at work late, etc. — I know he hasn’t chosen to be sick instead of be with me.


Ah. 95% of the time, if I am in the bathroom for half an hour, it is... distinctly not by choice. Working late can be a mixed bag; many workplaces make it only nominally your choice. (but if you are Working Late because it is a Fun/Cool/Exciting Project, then yes, a spousely insulted feeling over preferences/priorities may ensue)

That distinction makes some sense, though, at least sort of. And yes! He does not want to feel like death warmed over! He does not want you to feel like death warmed over! We're all in agreement here. :-)


KC - ah, but if the bathroom is noisy for ten minutes and then quiet for 20, he is in there by choice.


Ah. In the sort of bathroom excursions I am thinking of, I do sometimes stay put for a while to see if, uh, additional abrupt expulsion is likely to be occurring [if there are lower-torso signals that further demonstrative actions may occur], so there is that - technically, that is a choice, I suppose, on the occasions where further unpleasantness seems quite likely but is not certain. But it is not *much* of a choice, given the approximate frequency of additional practical protests, and also reduces aroma dispersal from the bathroom.

However, if I had a phone in there, the time-of-waiting might turn into a more distracted time-of-waiting-and-then-just-finishing-this-[level of game, article, email, etc.]...


KC - so daintily put!


Glad you were entertained by attempted euphemism. :-)

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