Hair

Thanksgiving went off without too much of note, until the very last moment.

We were all at the door, doing the long goodbye, in which we must all hug each other or shake hands or make some kind of contact. I am not a hugger. We are not a hugging people. Mom and Dad didn't even do intra-family hugging. Gary's mom, however, is a hugger, and if you dare depart her house without a hug she will demand one. Fine. She's nice enough to hug.

During the long goodbye (honestly sometimes I visit the restroom when I hear someone say goodbye because that means you have a good twenty minutes), Gary started fluffing my hair. We've recently made a deal that if he wants my hair natural then he was in charge of seeing I don't go out looking unkempt.

Wilma saw him fluffing my hair, and decided to help fluff.

"Oh! Your hair! It's so soft!" (more fluffing) "It's like cotton candy!"

Gary said "Her hair is really soft," while I leaned against him and tried to pretend this was not going on. I closed my eyes and thought it was almost over when I felt another hand in my hair.

"Oh!" my sister-in law Sandy said, "It is soft! What kind of conditioner do you use?"

I murmured to Gary, "Thank you so much. This is my dream. What I have always longed for."

My nephew said, "Well, now I have to touch it." Which he did. "Don't take this the wrong way, but it's like petting a really fluffy dog."

"Thank you," I said.

"Your face is really red," he added.

My new brother-in-law said, "Well, now I have to get in in this." And as he was patting my hair, Ken my father in law came over and added his hand in.

At that point every single person there was patting my hair. Which yes, is very soft. At that point I threw them off and started groping at their heads in retaliation.

 And then, after all that, they still wanted hugs. Crazy coarse-haired people.

Comments

[Zayrina]

My hair has gotten crazy long. It is nearly down to my buttocks. I usually wear it in a pony-tail and it is insane how people touch it, usually grabbing my long pony-tail and giving it a yank. First off, ouch, you just irritated the problem I am having with my neck and second, ewwww cooties in my hair. Patients grab my hair, asking if it is real, people walk by and bat it back and forth.

What on earth compels people to think this is ok?

[Lynn]

Okay, setting aside the oddness of that entire situation - cannot believe you wrote this post without telling us what kind of conditioner you use. THE SUSPENSE IS KILLING ME.

[Rosie]

Well, cripes, now I want to feel your hair. Can you send a lock? (That's not creepy at all, right?)

[Becs]

When my nephew, a teen-ager and flaxen haired, ventured into public in Tokyo, school children would gather around him, touch his hair and say, "Gaijin! Gaijin!" This sounds like what happened to you.

[Hattie]

Awwww! That is a very sweet family story. I think they love you!

[theQueen]

Lynn- Well technically it's OGX Thick & Full Conditioner, but I think its softness comes from weakness and fragility.
Rosie - I have so little hair I cannot spare a lock, otherwise I would just BECAUSE it's creepy.
Becs - Outsider! Kind of like the opposite of "One of us! One of us!"
Hattie - Hair is their Love Language, I guess.