Gary Gets Sassy
For some reason I was awake before Gary and I got to read the news, including a story about the Norwegian Spiral.
When woke up, I told him, "There was the coolest story on the news this morning. There was a photo of a perfect giant spiral in the sky over Norway, because a missile spun out."
Gary said, "That isn't really a story, is it?"
"Well there isn't really a plot."
Guilt Trip / Road Trip
I took Highway Forty to my dermatologist appointment at Barnes Hospital. Now that Highway Forty is finished, the electronic signs that formerly read
CLOSED BETWEEN I-170
These signs trouble me. I did not realize I had been pressuring Highway Forty. So, now I have to deal with Martyr Highways and Sassy Husbands.
And Then the Day Turned Around
So, I was naked in front of the dermatologist, and I commented I was now too fat to fit in the standard hospital gown.
"What? You look great!" he peered at me all over. "Everything checks out okay. I just need to look at the backs of your thighs."
I turned around and exposed my cellulite and said dryly, "Not my best part, you realize."
Again, "What! No, you're terrific!"
When women insult themselves, answer enthusiastically, "NO! You look GREAT!" This is a smart doctor.
He finished up and said, "Well you're easy to examine. You just don't have any spots or moles at all."
I thought about saying, "I'm just a big blank white whale of a woman," just to hear what he'd say.