Well, here's a full description of the guy I believe might have been chatting me up at the Coldplay concert. I report, you decide.
First of all, the .75 Sisters walk much faster than I do, even though my thick non-muscular legs are six inches longer than their colt-like sexy legs, plus they parked in B3 and I parked all the way out in G1, so by the time we met up they had more energy. So I was straggling a bit behind and I was speaking loudly at the backs of their heads.
"SO I WAS JUST IN THE BATHROOM AT BANDANAS AND THIS WOMAN CAME IN WITH HER TWO KIDS AND COMMENTED ON THE SMELL. AND THERE WERE ONLY TWO STALLS, AND I WAS ALL WTF LADY, I'M RIGHT HERE. AND I WOULD HAVE CALLED HER OUT BUT SHE HAD HER KIDS WITH HER."
(And that is true, every word. She was rude. Granted, it was smelly, and of course OBVIOUSLY my fault. But she had her toddlers with her, children now doomed to fear poop and never be potty trained.)
So, I can't promise you, but I am guessing this caught the attention of the Young Man, who was behind me. He was behind me while I was going up a fairly narrow series of steps. I don't know what he looked like except he was young and therefore beautiful. Maybe he didn't want a challenge; maybe he likes stinky poo, maybe he figured I was drunk.
He was fairly certainly drunk, but I might be influenced by the large beer he was carrying. He was in my blindspot as we climbed the stairs.
"How are you doing? Are you excited about the concert? Are you going to have a good time?"
"Why yes," I said politely, over my shoulder. If I glanced down I could see the beer but not him.
"Yeah! We're all going to have a great time at the Coldplay concert! So what is it? Veronica?"
(Beer, I thought, Occam's Razor. The simplest explanation is usually correct. )
"Nope. Not even close."
"Something starting with an A then. Am I right?"
(Ahead of me, I heard someone say, "Oh Christ," not in an "Oh Christ our Lord and Savior save us from temptation" way but an "Oh Kee-rist, who is this asshole" type of way.)
"Nope," I said just as we got off the top step and he caught up with me shoulder-to-shoulder. I was looking ahead at the .75 Sisters, and I didn't make eye contact with him, but my guess is he finally saw my face.
He said, "Well, have a good time!" and thought, "Christ! I almost came on to my Mom!" or "She would have snapped me like a twig" or "I think her friend with the good legs is probably taken anyway."
So, that was it. Probably my Final Chat-Up. Of course, ~~Silk gives me hope.
But! His first sight of you was FROM BEHIND and that encouraged him to make contact!! I've recently received a CD of photos from a trip I was on. Many of them feature my rear view and, I tell you, I have rarely been so disappointed and dismayed in all my life.
So maybe your face didn't make the grade, but clearly you have the butt of a 23 year-old.
Or he was a drunken pervert, of course.
Posted by: Big Dot | July 30, 2009 at 12:53 AM
OH...I remember THAT guy. I was like...who the hell just joined our group? Ellen made a friend aready!
Posted by: #0.75 | July 30, 2009 at 07:08 AM
Getting picked up from the back? That is teh awesome. Srsly.
Posted by: SurprisingWoman | July 30, 2009 at 10:48 AM
Don't forget that it was your mother who told me to look that direction, and to go for it.
Posted by: ~~Silk | July 30, 2009 at 11:10 PM
I just checked SiteMeter, and I got almost a dozen visits direct from this post. Unfortunately, anyone who visited is unlikely to figure out the reference from anything I've written recently. For those who need illumination, I am 64, and have been dating a man 15.5 years younger for the past two years. And the Queen Mother was right. It's fun, except for the long-distance part. Frustrating sometimes, but fun. I recommend it highly.
Posted by: ~~Silk | July 30, 2009 at 11:20 PM
Big Dot - No, my rear has always been bad- but then again, my huge thighs used to be my worst feature and now so much fat is on my hips they look well-proporitoned.
.75 - And I would have thought that too, except new friends don't play the name-guessing game.
Surprising Woman - He might have been so near my rear that he couldn't see anything else to judge its relative size.
~~Silk - My mom, the Cougar-Maker!
Posted by: TheQueen | July 31, 2009 at 12:45 AM