We watched the debate tonight. I intended to watch it calmly and reasonably, However, we got on TiVo-time early on because Gary kept pausing the TiVo to yell at Senator McCain.
Gary started out the evening in a foul mood anyway. Thankfully he was able to redirect hs excessive anger at the pund-idiots and the Republican candidate. When Gary's bellowing out single-minded fury the only way to calm him down it is to one-up him. He'll sense the parody and it turns into a joke.
I paused the TiVo at the first mention by McCain of his much vaunted mavericky-ness. "Bullshit!" I roared. "Yeah, maybe you were a maverick once, but you've been a poodle the past eight years."
"Fuck yeah!" Gary yelled.
"Fucking poodle." I grumbled.
"Fucking shit-eating poodle," Gary corrected me. (And I apologize to any of you who may have beloved shit-eating poodles.) I laughed, he laughed, then we stopped even trying to be reasonable. Later on, McCain mentioned General Petraeus. [Pause TiVo] "General Petraeus is a cocksucker!" And, really, I'm sure he isn't, it's just Gary was getting worked up again.
Gary can do a pretty good McCain imitation, in which he shuffles, bobs his head, and barks, "My friends."
Then we saw the point at which McCain stood up and wandered about during Obama's healthcare response, like Al Gore did in 2000. Then the fun began. Gary manipulated the TiVo back and forward to make it appear McCain was doing a little dance, peeking into the frame and stepping back out. Then I noticed McCain made a little upward hand gesture, which when reversed and forwarded repeatedly made him look like he was masturbating. Then I just rolled off the couch laughing.
Now, I originally wanted to watch the debate to hear views and seem reasonable and play devil's advocate, but it just didn't turn out that way. Pretty soon I was wishing someone would just wink at me like our Sarah Flanders of the Yukon, the VP nominee. I intended to be a good open-minded responsible citizen, but the only opening that crossed my mind was then neckline on Michelle Obama's dress. Mrs. McCain kicked Mrs. Obama's ass in the appropriate wardrobe department.
What was Michelle Obama wearing anyway? A red low-cut Christmas party dress with glittery holly appliques on it? Bad call.
Not that that's going to influence my vote.