Soon, we will plunge our faces into the official Christmas food. I am particularly prepared for this, having followed the post-pancreas low-fat diet faithfully.
I heard recently that "ham" is typical Christmas food. I never had ham for Christmas. (Mom will correct me, I'm sure.) I know we had a Breakfast smörgåsbord that was delicious.
The in-laws don't have ham, because ham is too easy. Instead, they have a buffet of olives, rye bread dip, dollar rolls, lunch meat, and cakes brownies and cookies diced into the smallest portions you can imagine.
Of course, they don't have turkey or fish. No fish, because if you leave fish or potato salad out for over an hour it becomes poisonous, and no turkey because it makes Karen conscious that she's eating an animal. She will tolerate a carved turkey as long as the legs are chopped off and hidden under the sliced meat.
On the other hand, I like food to look like what it is. I've spent a fair amount of time lately at West County Mall, where the J. Buck's serves calamari. Not the calamari that looks like octopus suckers, this is the stuff that looks like what it is: baby octopuses. (Huh. The Typepad spell checker thinks "octopi" is an affectation.) Evidently U.S. chefs remove the tentacles, but at J. Bucks they keep the tentacles and all. The ones I had a few years ago looked like this:
Hah! Baby Squid! I own you! Get your tiny self into my belly.
In fact, if you like food that looks like what it is, you can't do better than seafood. Lobster, shrimp (to some degree), those cute baby squid. Nom nom nom! Welcome to the top of the food chain!
Otherwise, it's hard to find foods that look like the original animal (See: Pig snouts, the search for). I have little opportunity to eat quail, but I understand they are sometimes served with the little head and beak intact. I would eat that. I would. I would crunch their bones.
I know this is horrifying the vegetarians out there, and I'm sorry, but at least I'm honest. If I can't overcome my base desire to eat other living creatures, at least I look them in the eye when I do it.