From Ill Communication:
1. Egg Nog or Hot Chocolate? -- Luckily for me, I think Egg Nog is vile. Luckily, because I'm allergic to raw eggs. And I think it contains raw eggs. Doesn't it? Nothing else could account for the vileness.
2. Does Santa wrap presents or just sit them under the tree-- Santa gives your parents the gifts with the understanding they will wrap them in the family paper and write "From Santa" on the tag.
3. Colored lights on tree/house or white-- All white. At our house the Christmas lights have been streamlined down to six bush nets tossed over the front landscaping. Five minutes up, five minutes down. And this year, zero minutes up.
4. Do you hang mistletoe?-- I have fake mistletoe under which I get fake kisses.
5. When do you put your decorations up-- I was so sad to discover German families have the tradition of putting up the tree on Christmas eve. Usually, I try to put up some streamlined decorations before the Tea, but this year the only decor has been wrapped presents on top of the bookcases.
6. What is your favorite holiday dish (excluding dessert)-- Huh! I'm running through Holiday dishes and I can't think of any I like. I don't like Gingerbread. I don't like sugar cookies. And I can't think of any non-dessert Holiday-specific foods.
7. Favorite Holiday memory as a child-- Oh, visiting Aunt Carleen's for her annual tree-trim. Once I recall going down the street to Ted Drewes and picking out a Christmas tree from their lot.
8. When and how did you learn the truth about Santa? -- Village Square in Hazelwood used to be a shopping plaza, and in the middle they would set up Santa's workshop. All the kids would go in, sit on Santa's lap, and tell Santa what they wanted, while the parents waited for them behind the Workshop. One year I noticed that Santa's conversations with the kids were being piped on the PA system to their parents outside, and that Santa's questions were along the lines of "What type of Barbie, honey? The Malibu Barbie, or the Bendable Barbie?" And then it all became horribly, horribly clear.
9. Do you open a gift on Christmas Eve?-- Luckily the in-laws do all gifts on Christmas eve. And of course 12 midnight Christmas Day is officially Christmas.
10. How do you decorate your Christmas Tree?-- We buy each other a memorial ornament each year, which often goes on a tree. Years ago my Mom made my Dad build a stylized Two-dimensional Christmas tree made of Balsa wood to hang over the fireplace, upon which ornaments have been permanently affixed. Five minutes up, five minutes down. This year I decided to make my own and got about 1/3rd done before the croup struck.
11. Snow! Love it or Dread it?-- Fresh snow, yes.
12. Can you ice skate?-- Haha. One would think that I could with the industrial work horse ankles I have, but no.
13. Do you remember your favorite gift?-- Last year Mom bought me a copy of The King, The Mice, and The Cheese, which was the first book I read. Even better, she later found our original copy in the hall closet.
14. What's the most important thing about the Holidays for you?-- Getting to use my vast collection of silverplate at the Tea. (Stomps feet petulantly.) Oh, and Peace on Earth.
15. What is your favorite Holiday Dessert?-- I say if there's a dessert that no one eats unless its the holidays then that's a sucky dessert.
16. What is your favorite holiday tradition? -- I'll have to check with Mom, because she's the Keeper of the Traditions. If we do something two years in a row then Mom establishes it as a tradition. Then once I get it straight that we always have a Delmonico roast with Sauce Provencal on Christmas day, then Mom re-evaluates the tradition and we all realize we don't even like Sauce Provencal. I think (and correct me if I'm wrong) the current tradition is we bring Festive breakfast breads etc. to Mom's on Christmas morning.
17. What tops your tree?-- Always a star, never an angel. I just feel so bad roughly jamming the tree up the Angel's skirt.
18. Which do you prefer - giving or receiving?-- Giving is better (with the exception of hostess gifts I sometimes score at the Holiday Tea. Folds arms roughly and kicks at floor.) I understand that receiving is going to be great this year, because Mom has a gift for me that has her completely tickled.
19. What is your favorite Christmas Song?-- "I Want a Hippopotamus for Christmas" - Such lyrics!
"Mother says a hippo would eat me up, but then
Teacher says a hippo is a vegetarian."
Now, if you'd asked what my favorite Holiday song is, I'd have said "Hanukkah Blessings" off Barenaked for the Holidays. I recall really liking some gold coins Carleen used to give us at the tree trim. I understand that gelt coins are a Hanukkah tradition. And, imagine a Gary gift every day for eight days ...
You mean I'm not the only one that doesn't decorate with angels because "angels don't deserve to be gangraped by a dead tree branch, they're angels, not demons, demons should get tree branches stuck up them"?
My relief is palpable.
Posted by: melati | December 11, 2006 at 06:12 PM
This is fun. I am going to steal it.
Posted by: Carrie | December 12, 2006 at 11:49 AM
Carrie - I like yours better.
Melati - Did you hear? Carrie uses angels.
Posted by: TheQueen | December 13, 2006 at 01:19 AM