First: a geography lesson.
Let's start you in East Saint Louis, Illinois. You are standing on the bank of the Mississippi River and looking West. You are looking at the Arch. You are in great danger because you are in East Saint Louis. (Well you are.) Go west. Swim west, that is. Hurry! Swim faster!
So, now you are under the Arch. Start walking. If you walk west for five miles you are technically no longer in Saint Louis City, because for some odd reason there's a law that Saint Louis City will never get bigger than five miles wide.
Walk west through Saint Louis County for another ten miles and you will see another river, the Missouri River. Cross that river, walk another half mile west and you will be at my house. (Hi. Rest a bit.)
Keep walking for another ten miles and you will leave the suburbs and find yourself in the small town of O'F_____ Missouri. I used to think of it as a suburb, but now that I have attended the 150th anniversary celebration of the birth of O'F______, I know it is a small town. A small Music Man Seventy-Six Trombones We Got Trouble Right Here, Right Here in O'F______ kind of town.
Mr. Wonderful and the other denizens staged a fine theatrical production celebrating O'F_____s 150 years. There was some fine amateur acting during the dramatization of the founding of their fine town including some scary non-apologies on the topics of Native Americans and slavery ("Who else would have cleared the land?" You, you lazy ass. You and your buddy Dan'l Boone). There was a truly lovely hammer dulcimer solo.
And then, my favorite part:
NUNS SINGING IN GERMAN! They started with "The Happy Wanderer!" Val-de-ri! Val-der-ra! I don't know if this song was originally in German, but they sang it that way. And you know what? It was great. And you know what else? It had nothing to do with O'F________ and its history. But nuns, they gotta sing.