Saturday was a big long day in which we celebrated our 21st anniversary. This could be an excruciatingly long post, or I could try to go with the post version of the movie montage.
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Amazingly, we got up at 7:30 to get to the Susan Komen Race for the Cure (or as we did it, the Amble like a Barnyard Animal Trundling Into the Corral for a Cure). There was one hill toward the beginning when you hit the peak of the hill and for the first time saw the crowd stretched out in front of you. People cursed religiously ("Holy ____" "Sweet F____ Jesus"), hands went up, cameras came out, and I since I imagine it happened about 64,000 times I nabbed someone else's photo from the KSDK website:
Actually, that doesn't really show how many people were there. You know what shows how many people were there? Gary and I got up at 7:30 and we were there.
(Look at this photo. Do you love the person on the right going the wrong way? I do. Good luck to you.)
Anyway, we got to the one mile point and Gary said, we aren't tired, lets do the full 5K. We made many 'race' references, we hung close to the inside of the track turning the corner by SLU, and we saved up our strength for a big burst of energy at the end. Then we went to Barnes and Noble where our t-shirts inspired five people to ask how the race was. I realized I've known six people with breast cancer and none who died, which is of course a very good thing. And I was foolish enough to mention to one person there were people smoking on the Race, and she reminded me it is better to Smoke and Race then Not to Have Raced At All.
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That took us to 2:00, when we went home and napped hard. We napped away planned Karaoke Togetherness time, and Music Practicing time, and Scheduled Anniversary You-Know Time, and brought us right up to Shower Time. As Gary showered I discovered 'Someone' was kind enough to send me a video through YouTube. I began puzzling out why, then I remembered when the French Catamites decided to reference my blog. I spent entirely too much time wondering why my site appealed to Young (Legal!) French Boys before discovering it was a cunning plan to dupe me into linking to French Boys Who Say "Mes testicules sont énormes !" I don't think the video link was a cunning plan, and I enjoyed the They Might Be Giants video, and if you are Someone I appreciated it.
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We got to the Adam's Mark right across from the Arch and settled in for a nice meal of Elk and Snapper. You would think we would have tied on the pricey bib and tucker for the 20th anniversary, not the 21st, but the 20th anniversary gift is China. We made it a week-long Chinese celebration in which every meal was Chinese, we had Chinese Fire Drills, and we ate much Dim Sum and one Peking Duck (and if you haven't had some, go get some now. Or 24 hours from now).
The Elk I had was pretty much what you might imagine a giant roast beef tenderloin to be. It tasted like very tender peppery aged roast beef. Oddly, all we ordered was the Snapper special, Elk, lobster bisque (I am adding a crescent of puff pastry to all my cream soups from now on), Quail Egg Salad, creme brulee (which they made in a shallow bowl to maximize the caramelized sugar area) and flourless cake. And two glasses of wine. But they threw even more food at us. They sent out an appetizer with the chef's compliments (duck dumpling), and then carted out chocolates after dinner, and then when the waiter handed me a rose I asked how he knew it was our anniversary and he forced a take-home slice of cheesecake on me. SO I'm done eating for the week.
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But wait! There's more! We were in the lobby and saw some members of the Red Hat Society. We had seen some members at the Race that morning and I mentioned to Gary that I planned to join when I turn 50. "You CAN"T!" he gasped. "They're Republican!" I'm so ashamed. I didn't know. I'm still suspicious.
When the Red Hats asked us to take their pictures of course we obliged and asked if they had been the Red Hats at the race and they said yes, they were the only Red Hats there. Our paths would have crossed again if we had visited downtown Saint Charles or the Star Wars convention at the hotel.
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So Gary didn't feel this was enough drama for one day and on the way home in the mad thunderstorm he took the fabled Wrong Exit that everyone in Saint Louis takes at least once, the one that forces you to cross the river and visit East Saint Louis Illinois. Follow this link and scroll to the table under Crime. (One would think they wouldn't have 225.1 rapes a year if they paid their police force. ) Anyway, we survived the detour into Criminal Funland and made it home to Saint Charles (33 rapes per year, thank you) while Gary demanded I STOP SLEEPING AND HELP HIM DRIVE BECAUSE WE ARE GOING TO CRASH IN THIS RAIN BECAUSE WE CAN"T EVEN SEE THE ROAD. Shut UP.
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We had speculated that Mac the BaramoDog might just put on his fear of thunder for us when we are home, but it appears not. During our absence, he had spent the thunderstorm:
- Scrabbling the coverlet on the bed so hard it fell on the floor.
- Digging under a pillow on the bed and puking, then repositioning the pillow as a nice surprise.
- Clawing to get into the basement.
- Scrabbling up the now-destroyed rubber bathmat in the tub. (I tell you, heading for the basement and the tub? He watches the Weather Channel.)
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So now it's the next day and I have the oxymoronish sensation of a big flabby belly coupled with a tight strong ass.
The mystery of the "Someone" who sent the video link is solved. It was the Queen Mother, who was having a Hey-Its-That-Guy moment because it opens with the guy recently added to the Daily Show lineup.
Posted by: TheQueen | June 11, 2006 at 04:42 PM