Well, we did pretty well. We got through a year and a quarter without having an epic fight about retirement financial role reversal.
Originally, I was relaxed, and Gary was stressed, and neither of us counted pennies. Now, Gary is the Relaxation Expert, and I am stressed. What provoked the epic fight? He wanted to buy $300 of birdseed the day after he drained our account of all discretionary funds.
“Gary, we have eight bags of birdseed in the basement.”
“Ellen, relax, we'll just put it on the credit card.”
Commence fighting. I'm overreacting because I'm the one who made sure all debts were paid off before retirement. Putting stuff in the card makes me hysterical. I feel like I've fought cancer, and I've relapsed and Gary is saying, “Relax, it's just cancer again. Its just for a little while.”
But now due to a perfect storm of an unexpected BNL cruise, the renter holding my feet to the fire, and a birdseed sale, I find that some things have to go on the credit card, just for a month or so.
So now I'm overreacting and I'm being that spouse, the spouse I hate, the stingy spouse. Of course, any spouse who isn't Gary is stingy. Gary is the guy who bought 21 gifts for my 21st birthday. I'm insisting that for this birthday he buy me a collapsing hose. (He already bought one for his Dad. It's this year's iPad.)
Of course, after the fight we both swung too far the other way, and now Gary is feeding the birds two-thirds less and I'm ignoring the credit card bill. I haven't paid it off in two weeks and I have no idea what it is. La la la.
The day after the fight I found this article on line.
CAMDEN, Maine (AP) — Charles and Lisa Black moved to Maine after careers as teachers in Kansas, pursuing an idyllic retirement that prosecutors say was destroyed by arguments over money and infidelity before both plummeted off a cliff.
Prosecutors say 71-year-old Charles Black hit his wife on the head with a rock before pushing her off the 800-foot Maiden Cliff in April 2011 in in Camden Hills State Park. Lisa Black, 55, says she believed Charles was chasing her when he, too, tumbled down the mountain, according to a police report.
I immediately emailed it to Gary. When I walked in that evening he said, "Did you hear about that retired couple who tried to kill each other?"
"Oh, the story I emailed you?"
"I haven't read my email."
Gary sides with the husband, who claims he never hit his wife with a rock, the injury she sustained to her head came when he hit his head on her head as they tumbled down the hill. After he bought birdseed he didn't need, no doubt.