Why Meno"pause"? I don't want a pause, I want a complete eradication of the meno. MenoShrivelUpandDieWorthlessFleshPocket.
So, I was at the gyno today and mentioned the hot flashes at the beginning of last month and the hysterical crying that prompted Gary to proclaim The Change was upon us.
The gyno said, "Well, 51 is the average age menopause starts." And I am nothing if not average. Especially when it comes to being a female.
He advised that I should finish up this month of birth control, stay off it for two weeks, and then come back for a blood test to see if I have any hormones at all.
He also said there were supplemental hormones that could help with the hot flashes. Hormones, good or bad? I don't need any now, because the flashes fade in ... well, a flash, essentially. Of course, I've been supplementing my body with artificial female hormones since I was eighteen, since that's what my birth control pill is.
Oooh, what if I'm done with the Menstruation already? My breasts showed up in the course of a week, maybe I'll just knock out this menopause thing before the end of my birthday month.
More likely, I have years ahead of me of turmoil and sweat, or else I'll try this birth control hiatus and, after period-free years, I will stain myself at work.