My brother-in-law can booty-pop like Beyonce.
If you apply for a job working with physicians and the ad says "Master's Degree required," don't believe it, because, "You don't need no Master's degree to work with no doctors."
Be sure to say you are "working on" your Master's degree.
Kinoki Foot Pads are a great gift. "They must work because they have green tea in them." They remove toxins! (It's got electrolytes.)
Audio cards that fart can make my sister-in-law laugh until she cries, especially if no one else is laughing.
If a 25 year old went to visit Pakistan when he was 6, he is well-traveled.
Saint Louis Bread Company now delivers, and we know this because God Himself put a flyer on the in-laws' kitchen table right before they found they were to have visitors. God mass-mails in mysterious ways.
There is some woman who has made a filthy, filthy commercial for Hardees. She eats a hamburger and lifts her skirt up too far. "It is disGUSTing!" "It made me SICK!" "I almost THREW UP!" "I would never eat one of those hamburgers! It didn't even make the hamburger look good!" Gary found it on YouTube as soon as he got home.