Mom once showed me an article on the stages of a gardener: year one: annuals, year two: bulbs, year three: roses, year four: perennials, and so on.
There must be similar stages of Facebook.
I am now in the stalking old boyfriends stage. I know all of you went through this two years ago, but I am late to facebook, just I was late to sex and late to drinking and I'll probably try to nurse random babies off the street at ninety. But it's just so easy! And so painless. You just search, then you send a cryptic email, then you disappear. It's like playing ring and run. No consequences.
It has made me bold enough to go to what must be the next stage: stalking missing relatives. Technical Father had two children in his later (evidently drunken) life: Julia and Joey. Joey was institutionalized, and all I know of Julia is she had a baby boy with a distinctive name. So I'm thinking of ambushing Julia. I never wanted to make contact with her before, but Facebook contact is almost like non-contact. It's the middle-class version of "have your people call my people."
I don't have quite enough info to drop the "Hi. I'm your half-sister," bomb on Julia, but what do you think? When I think of people who search out adoptive parents, I always wonder why. It never occurred to me it might just be to see the reaction.